Monday, January 26, 2015

Day 26: Who do you want to be?

The Mission Statement:  Day 3 (based on Creating a New Mission Statement from the New York Times)

Today's question is "Who do you want to be?"

Well, they don't go small with this mission statement thing do they?

It is hard for me to think of who I want to be because my mind keeps thinking about what I want to be. I keep thinking of things that I can name like dancer, writer, artist, student, friend, lover, and the list goes on.  I don't feel that what I want to be really answers the question of who I want to be. And really, when you get right down to it there really is only one person I want to be.


Who else am I going to be?  Who else can I be but myself?  Of course maybe the point of this question is to give some thought to just exactly who I am and maybe to consider if I want to be exactly the me I am right now.  I mean right now "me" is far from perfect.

The me that I am right now is the product of her experience and not all of that experience was good, some of it left her hesitant, scarred, and unsure. The me that I am right now is afraid of many things.  She isn't always as accepting of herself that she could be or as she'd like to be.    She lives with a lot of anxiety and she'd really like to be more trusting of her fellow humans.  She is very demanding of herself and others.

Of course she also had experiences that made her as survivor.  She doesn't like to see others in pain or suffering and will do what she can to relieve it.  She tries her best to do the right thing.  Despite being unsure and afraid she still more often than not manages to do the very things she is afraid of.  She believes in her dreams and will pursue them with all of her being even if others may not fully understand just what is she is attempting to achieve.  She loves deeply.  She wants to leave the world a better place.

The me that I am is well aware of her flaws and her mistakes.   Maybe she could learn to be just as aware of her more positive attributes.

Who do I want to be? A better me?  A more evolved me?  A more realized me?   We all know I how feel about those expressions...if you think I'm going to say "a more authentic me" you are going to wait a very long time.

The only thing I really know for sure is that, good or bad,  the person that I am tomorrow will be at least a tiny bit different than the one I am today. it is unavoidable. So maybe I just want to be a me that is not as burdened by her past and a little more willing to face the future without expectation. 

How is that for an answer?

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