Ordinary Day

Today was a busy day.  I think busy days are ordinary days for most of us.  We live lives packs pretty full from rising to bed.

Mine began at 6:00AM and included working both of my jobs, working on an email newsletter, a nap, feeding myself, teaching a dance class, an episode of RHONY and being interviewed on a radio program to help promote  the 2017 Pagan Unity Day.

I'm tired.  And I have a bit of headache.

I've another ordinary day tomorrow!

Ordinary Emotions

I awoke this morning feeling...

...anxious
...a little sad
...self doubt
...hopeful

The anxiety is in part due to a very full plate in the coming weeks and I'm definitely worried about getting things done (and done well).  I'm also anxious about a close friendship that has hit some bumps and I'm not totally clear where things stand with this person. The sadness and self doubt are leftovers from the reemergence some old pain and hurts that I'm still healing from.  The hope is because unlike many other days, today I can identify what it is that I'm feeling and why.

When I went to bed last night I was feeling pretty good.  My day had a bumpy start but I managed to stay focused on work.  I had lunch with a friend, taught a dance class and hung out with other friends after.  I went to bed feeling fairly content and grateful for the people in my life.   I feel like I slept fairly well.  I don't recall my dreams from last night.

I got up, wiped sleepy bits from my eyes, fed the cats (dealt with a momentary hissing match - they are still adjusting), said good morning to my housemate, made coffee and, yes, took a moment to write my thoughts in my journal - which definitely helped with the hopeful part.

And now I'll go on with my day, feeling what I'm feeling.

Ordinary Morning

I have a fantasy morning routine in which I wake up with the sun feeling alert and rested.  I have a glass of water before putting on my walking shoes and heading out of the house for a morning stroll.  My walk takes me past some beautiful place by the sea, or through a field of blooming wildflowers.

When I arrive home I meditate, after which I brew a fresh cup of some fantastic roast of coffee.  I sit and write in my journal, noting the flowers I saw on my walk or thoughts that came to me during my meditation.  I'll probably make a few lists of things I want to do that day.  I'll check the time and to my delight, I've a few minutes to spare for a bit of yoga.

The key word here is FANTASY.

My mornings do start early; I try to get up two hours before I have to start work (today that means 6:00AM as I'll log into work at 8:00).  I feed the cats, and then peruse Facebook on my phone while waiting for the kettle to boil.  The coffee part is mostly right as I do buy at least decent coffee and I make it by the cup in a small french press. At some point I'll realize I've become lost down an internet rabbit hole and I've only 15 minutes left to get dressed and make a second cup of coffee.  If I'm lucky, and I plan ahead, I may find time to write in my journal.

Lately there is about a 50/50 chance that after I feed the cats, I'll go back to bed, forget to set the alarm and find myself waking up ten minutes before work begins.

Every once in a while, when the stars align properly or I'm in the midst of a period of dedicated self improvement,  I'll have my coffee, read the news, write in my journal, get dressed and upon looking at the clock realize that I actually do have ten or so minutes to spare for meditation.  

After which I of course pat myself on the back for having such a well organized morning routine.

What is your ordinary morning?

30 Days of Ordinary

Ordinary Feet

or·di·nar·y

ˈôrdnˌerē/

adjective

1.  with no special or distinctive features; normal. (courtesy of dictionary.com)


It could be an act of resistance against the sort of life society says I should be living these days.

Maybe it is a reaction to the "just-so tousled hair, profile facing a horizon of ocean/mountains/trees, tagged with a quote about living an authentic life" photos that seem to fill my Instagram and Facebook feed lately.

Perhaps it is in response to comments that have come my way recently that lead me to recognize that the way others perceive my life to be is so wildly different from what it actually is (thank you social media). 

(I really, really hope it is not some subconscious, sideways humble brag...OMGoodness, look how damn NORMAL I am!!!)

Okay...um...let's just assume your motives are 99% noble and actually get to the point.

I have long been an advocate for honesty in social media. If you are having a shitty day you should feel absolutely free to say just that. If you really put a lot of work into accomplishing a long desired goal, brag away! And people do. In fact my social media feeds seem to be exercises in extremes that waver between "the world is falling apart" and "I LOOOOOOOOOVE my friends!!! MUAH!"

And I'm just as guilty. When I post at all these days, what I have I put out there has become a carefully cultivated garden of outrage, how I keep my shit together, and hey, hope y'all have a happy, happy day - thankful to be alive, with long, long periods of silence and cat pictures.

If it isn't carefully thought out, edited, and filtered it isn't shared. I find myself, despite my best efforts, creating a very careful presentation of my life...even when talking about the not so great stuff. Even my sad days have to be perfectly sad or I don't share them!

What it is missing is the day to day.

What is missing is the ordinary.

So here is where I announce my idea, my project, 30 Days of Ordinary. Each day I am going to write about or share a photo of something ordinary from my life. I'm not totally sure what that means yet, but I've a few rules I'm setting for myself.

1. Photos must be unedited (not filters, or color changes, etc) and when I take them I'm allowed two attempts.

2. Ordinary does not mean boring. I can write about said above extremes or something that I find exciting, but it has to be honest. I'm not allowed to embellish or edit to make things look 'not so bad' or 'not so good.'

3. Performance photos are not allowed unless it's process oriented. Performance is a step outside of the ordinary and I tend to do myself up to hide imperfections, but practice photos are fine.

So here we go. Thirty days of ordinary...


NOTE: I lay no claim to 30 Days of Ordinary. If you wish to do your own 30 Days of Ordinary feel free! I'll be sharing photos on Instagram (@spinsterjane) with the hashtag #30daysofordinary. I'd love to see more!