Monday, December 30, 2013

Day 30 - What do you want to do less of in 2014??

Today's Blogher blog prompt is "What do you want to do less of in 2014?"

The answer?  Everything.  Well everything except sleep.  I want much more sleep in 2014.

I have always led a busy life but 2013 was the year of doing too much.  I pretty consistently over committed myself and though I generally managed to get everything accomplished, I would not say that 2013 was the year of my best work.

This past fall was my first full time semester.  In order to finish earning my degree in three semesters I enrolled in five classes which in hindsight was not a good plan. While I expect to have at least one mid-semester break down, this past semester I had about four.  I struggled to keep up with homework and projects. My grades suffered and though I ended up with three As and one B, I also received the first C of my college career.  I was never so grateful to have a semester be over.

I overbooked myself creatively.  I am fiercely dedicated to making a success of the troupe I manage. Handling the general management, booking and creative direction is a full-time job.  I also wanted to make sure that I kept up with my solo creative work and I began teaching dance for the first time this year.  I often felt as though I was so busy handling the management of the troupe that my personal creative practice became neglected.  Particularly in the areas of dance and music.  When the fall semester began I had trouble keeping up with my writing and even took a blog hiatus for a time.  Somehow I managed to write a little something every day for that last part of the year.

To earn some extra money, which I desperately needed, I took on a few crochet commissions and taught some classes.  I worked two part-time jobs, which should have been enough to cover expenses but I had some health issues this year and so did my elderly cat which depleted what little savings I had.

As as result of this I felt a lot of stress and exhaustion.  I had practically no social life and struggled greatly with feelings of isolation and loneliness.  I was short fused and grumpy most of the time.  I cried a lot.  I pretty much stopped any exercise outside of what dance practice I could fit in and walking between home and school.  I definitely didn't eat right and I had several nights where it was a glass of wine that got me to bed.  Everything suffered.  I am quite sure that all of this contributed greatly to mental state I find myself in now (which we will sum up as not being in my happy place).

And just to be consistent I'm finishing the year in the same manner.  The past four nights I have been up until the wee hours working on props and costuming for my troupes NYE show.  I'm in that place of exhaustion where I feel like if I stop moving I'll just fall where I stand.

In 2014 I'd like to simply do less.

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